just came home from chocolate cake outing.. was smsing shichang since before we left.. but i think he fell asleep as i was heading back home.. when i got home, i was just thinking how much our relationship has changed.. we used to tell each other everything.. and i would sms him the entire day till my battery went flat.. and we would still chat online till 3.30 in the morning.. and even when he got drafted, he would sms me every night.. and i would cry every night.. (for two weeks, at least..) he relied on me to get news of all the arsenal games.. and wat happened in buffy.. (i even taped the last episode for him..) and sometimes when i missed his sms, i would get really upset with myself.. cos those few moments of contact meant so much to me.. but it just got less and less.. and now, i dont even know when i'll next hear from him..

i used to sms him whenever i was frustrated with my group mates.. because he told me to.. to prevent him from dying of boredom.. and i would.. even if i knew i wouldnt get a reply anytime soon.. so how come i dont do that now.. instead, i turn to others like noel.. i suppose its because we havent had a good conversation in such a long time that everything seems out of point now.. theres just so much to catch up on, that we will never get to it.. and it will never be the same as before.. i dont know wat it will become.. i dont know if it can get any worse than this..